God is love. We hear that throughout our readings this Sunday, and it’s often how we describe and even define God, if such a thing is possible. “God is love” is something I sang in Sunday school when I was little and heard preached in church throughout my life. I believe it, but I haven’t thought too much about what that really means.

In many ways, God can seem pretty nebulous, and so I don’t know how to even conceptualize God’s love without looking at it through the lens of human love. I guess I could say that I know what God’s love feels like because I have experienced love from people. This is a throwback, but do you remember when people were talking about love languages? It’s a term coined by Gary Chapman in his book The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. Given the title, it’s obviously a book written for couples, but I can see how the concept of love language could be helpful to consider in other relationships. Family, community, friends all express and receive love for each other, and knowing what makes each of us feel loved can be helpful in all of our relationships. For instance, what makes me feel loved is when someone is present, when they listen compassionately without fixing or judging. I also feel loved when someone helps me, especially when it’s a task or a project that means a lot to me. That shows me that they’re with me, that I’m not alone, that they care for me. Other people feel the most loved when those close to them express affection or affirm them or give a thoughtful gift. It’s good self-knowledge, I think, to recognize the things that make us feel loved, and it’s helpful to notice and appreciate people’s efforts to care for us, even if they do so in ways that we don’t initially recognize as love.  

When I feel loved by a person, in whatever way they show it, I also get a small inkling of God’s love for me, and I guess one could say with assurance that God speaks all love languages quite fluently. As I think about it, the things that make me feel loved by a person are often what I seek out in God. I pray for God to help me, especially when I have to do something hard. God usually shows up in one way or another, either through help from a person or through a felt sense of peace or reassurance. I also turn to God for simple presence. When things get intense, I tend to look for ways to simply be present to God and allow God to be present to me, like a walk or gardening, centering prayer or singing. And then there are all the unsought, unexpected ways that God just shows up to love me – an encounter with a friend, song that comes up on a playlist, a beautiful sunset, a blooming flower.

As I considered what it means that God is love, though, it occurs to me that it’s not just about how I am loved but how I love other people. Love is mutual. The second reading this Sunday encourages, “Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God.” So, I experience God’s love not just when other people love me, but when I love other people. And this does make sense. The thing in me that draws me to compassion for another, to care for another, to want deeper connection with another, is of God. The thing in all of us that compels us to do good for one another is one of the most beautiful things about humanity. Of course that part of us comes from God. And this kind of love is not just a feeling, although I do experience it both emotionally and even physically (have you ever felt your heart actually move with compassion?). This kind of love leads to action. Of course I think that, right? Service is kind of my love language, maybe because I’m a person of Providence, and so I believe God’s love looks like care for other people. God provides; God doesn’t just have warm feelings. Even so, the warm feelings I receive when I care for another person come from God too.

Love is mutual, and the way we experience God’s love is often through human love. In our giving and receiving love, God’s love becomes real to us too. “Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God.”

For Reflection:

• What makes you feel loved and cared for?

• How do you love and care for other people?

• If you look back over this past week, what do you notice about how God has loved you? Are there specific moments in which you can perceive God’s love?

• What are some of the ways that God shows you God’s love for you?

Sister Leslie Keener, CDP

Sister Leslie Keener, CDP is the director of God Space, a community-building spirituality ministry in Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky. She’s a Sister of Divine Providence with a Masters in Ministry and a Certificate in Spiritual Direction and Retreats from Creighton University. She directs retreats, meets with people for spiritual direction, and serves as the vocation director for her community. She also serves on the Board of Spiritual Directors International. She enjoys music, dancing, meaningful conversations, and this present moment.